2005-09-17 - 3:17 PM

its the full moon coming tomorrow.
im always effected by the moon.
every feeling intensified and magnified
tears can flow in an instant for no reason.
i have felt the aloneness sharp and cutting this last week. along with that is the knowing that im supposed to be alone right now. im only a few months out of therapy and i need to try my own wings against the wind. the old music still calls to me, calling to me to find someone, anyone to take care of me. the odd thing is .. i have always taken care of myself and ended up taking care of the one that was supposed to take care of me. so this siren call is a lie, has always been a lie and for the first time in my life i know it.

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